three, two... one

three people i know showed up in my dream last night.

two of them knew each other.

one of them i thought i'd forgotten, but whom, it seems, i can't get over.

i dream of jeannie

... or cutie pie. yep, the cutie pie. i dreamt of him again. can't divulge much of what happened, partly because of privacy issues (mine), partly because of secrecy issues (like, someone is bound to get it, and i'm busted), but mostly because i can't remember much.

but from what i do recall, several kilig moments. as if they ever go beyond that. but then, much less in real life!

at least i know that god has a sense of humor. here i am going all crazy, and he gives me comic relief.

so i'm going back to crazy mode again. 24 hours to construct a paper? why do i even bother...

thunder only happens when it's raining

i was so running late. i looked through my closet, and couldn't find a single good dress or skirt to wear. finally i remember that i have this sleeveless green top -- definitely a notch up from my usual work duds -- which i paired with black pants when i attended a wedding. both were pressed and ready, and casual enough for the occasion. the place was in shambles from the hurricane that was me getting dressed, clothes strewn haphazardly across the bed and on the floor. my mind was so messed up with putting on the final touches and picking up everything i needed.

suddenly, out of the blue, he appeared. i don't know if he got impatient, or was just plain anxious, or if he just couldn't wait to see me. but he was there, right in front of me, and my heart skipped a beat. he cleaned up really nice. it was the first time i saw him fix up his hair, and i couldn't resist teasing him about it.

it seemed like only seconds, but we must have talked for several minutes before we realized that we had to go. i didn't know where exactly we were going, or what was in store for us, but when he took my hand i knew i made the right choice. we made the right choice. i lead him back to the stairs and out into the world where everything seemed to go our way.

then i opened my eyes, and i knew it was all just wishful thinking.

the dream

in the clear light of day, one rarely remembers how these things start, and this time it's no different. they say that dreams bring out our inner fears and wishes, but in this case i'm not sure whether it's one or the other. or maybe it was a gentle reminder from my inner soul.

it began with my high school class 10th anniversary reunion. my classmates were oddly dressed in regulation white caps and gowns, but even more odd (should it be?) is that i wasn't dressed the same. so as i contemplated changing into the "proper" costume in time for the official pictures, i kept myself busy with one thing or another. finally i decided to change, and went off to my dorm which was conveniently located next door from the reunion venue.

now, my landlady has all sorts of weird rules and habits, and my roommates (who i also assumed were part of the reunion) have sneaked in and planned to sneak back out after curfew time. but alas! as i was about to silently board the lift to my room i had to trip and fall and effectively wake up said landlady who was dozing in the rocking chair out in the hall. so, in order to pacify landlady i had to be miss congeniality as well as miss sugar and spice, and do various stuff in recompense such as arranging the clothes out in the hall (another quirk of dreamland).

finally i was done, just as the 11 o'clock curfew was approaching, and promptly started up the stairs with the intention of coming back down again. suddenly, i was back outside and meeting all these people who had just faced panic and upset of a sudden death. one of the girls (not my classmate, though, but someone in a previous storyline that i don't recall) had experienced something akin to heart attack and had just died. walking towards these people who were walking out, i saw a lad who appears to be the girl's boyfriend, and i grabbed him. i expected him to be hysterical, like the others were, but oddly he seemed dazed but weirdly happy. then i asked him to relate what happened, and i heard him recount how the girl had suddenly stiffened; the verdict, apparently, was unexplained calcium overdose (what?...) eventually she stopped struggling and her face became peaceful. and with expected omniscience, i saw that the boy knew that the girl had experienced an apparition: by jesus christ, no less.

just as i was taking it all in, the boy began to experience an epileptic attack and i had to hold on while shouting for help. when i looked back at his face, his eyes told me not to worry, and i felt a sudden aura of happiness from him. i then realized what had happened to the girl was happening to this boy as well. half fearfully i asked the boy, "is it him?" to which his eyes replied, "yes." but i had to make sure, and asked, "who is it...?"

...by then my mind was becoming contrary, and i realized that i was coming out of sleep.