Tuesday, June 29, 2004

time

for my best bud, in these turbulent times

it is not a thing to be held or to be kept
but it can be cherished

and when it passes we cannot see it
nor can we keep it from its path

it is not a thing
but it tells so much

and while you fear that not seizing the moment will rob you of your desires
on the contrary, time will show you exactly what you need and want
and a view from a distance gives a more comprehensive perspective

be not afraid of time or distance
for patience is a valuable virtue
and a love that endures is the love worth having

still a little bit of your taste in my mouth
still a little bit of you laced with my doubt
still a little hard to say what's going on

still a little bit of your ghost your witness
still a little bit of your face i haven't kissed
you step a little closer each day
and i can't see what's going on

stones taught me to fly
love taught me to lie
life taught me to die
so it's not hard to fall
when you float like a cannonball

still a little bit of your song in my ear
still a little bit of your words i long to hear
you step a little closer to me
so close that i can't see what's going on

stones taught me to fly
love taught me to lie
life taught me to die
so it's not hard to fall
when you float like a cannon

stones taught me to fly
love taught me to cry
so come on courage!
teach me to be shy
'cause it's not hard to fall and i don't want to scare her
it's not hard to fall and i don't wanna lose
it's not hard to grow
when you know that you just don't know

-- damien rice, cannonball

Sunday, June 20, 2004

a fun-filled day

my muscles are killing me.

two days after my marathon fully-booked sports-filled hungover friday. it's just one of those days that i wanted to do so many things... if only traffic permits. and it's the one day i shouldn't have done it because i'd been running on too much borrowed steam.

my day started waking up at 6 in my former officemate's unit. i was helping her with her strama, and i stayed up till past midnight. i had no real problem waking up, it's just getting out of there and getting back to my place that bothered me. luckily i found enough change to make the two jeepney rides to my place. no need to take a cab yet... that problem comes a little bit later.

got home in good time and luckily (again) got a slot in the shower. i'd already prepared all my stuff, even my work clothes, so it was a breeze getting out again. now my problem is having enough change for cabfare... i had money but it's 500 bucks! what to do? so i walked to the pandesal bakery a few blocks over and bravely (but truthfully) answered the question, "wala ka bang smaller bill?" "wala po." a sheepish smile and a thank you later i hailed a cab to go meet my aunt. sana wala pa siya sa meeting place namin.

fast-track to rcbc... the venue of my weekly breakfast with my aunt. after getting settled i called her on the mobile. this had to be the one day that she is late. usually it was me, and i get a few dark looks from her after offering my flimsy excuses. well, she's my aunt so i can't really get mad. anyway i didn't really care about getting late... heheheheh

sometime after 8 i head off to my office, a good 20-minute ride to the heart of manila. i had some stuff i wanted to do, some things i wanted to accomplish... unfortunately i'm running out of steam. so i spent the whole day alternating between inspiration and feeling like a zombie. good thing my friend ness can be reached on the other end of the line... i had to talk to her twice to get my spirits up. this considering that i'm seeing her much later in the day.

at 5.30 (quitting time!) vangie (my boss) and i got out in record time and headed to the nearest mall. to practice at the bowling lanes. hahaha. we have an upcoming game this friday, and we wanted to get ready. so we had three games in all, with me pulling off a personal record of 124 points (without handicap ha!) if my team captain finds out she'll probably pray i get it again. but as she's my teammate from last year she'll probably expect something nearer to 80.

on my way back to makati i called morell (the friend i was helping with strama), said i couldn't meet her before she leaves for her badminton game, and promised to keep tabs on her the whole evening. i then head home to get my things for my own badminton game, which i was a bit late getting to, and everything proceeded as expected.

went back home because my friends are fetching me from makati. yehey! this is the funny part. i planned a gimik with my best buds lei and ness, ness' bf pao, and our friend gary, knowing full well i'll be late. and usually we hang out at megamall/shangri-la, so it was a great load off my back that i didn't have to go there pala. after they fetched me at home we went by greenbelt for me to meet morell, then drove around aimlessly because we couldn't decide where to go. finally we settled on pier one at the fort, because i had to eat, and we had to hang out at a place with lots of people (as compromise to lei's disco ;) but the two weeks of little sleep and the hangover from the singapore trip finally caught up with me. while i was still my witty self i did space out from time to time. so when the others suggested leaving around 1 i didn't protest too much. eventually us three girls got to ness' place and had a mini-chika fest before dozing off one by one.

so went my very hectic, thank-god-it's-friday. the day i was looking forward to all week, being the day after my humres finals and for all the above events that happened. this is the kind of day that makes me realize i'm addicted to company, and i want to be with people all the time if time, schedules, and traffic will allow. it's also manifested in the way i walk (rather fast, trying to overtake everybody) because i want to accomplish so much in the little time i have, and i don't want to waste it walking or traveling. i guess this is the bane of my life. i try to take on so many things that i forget to step back and relax during the day. does this mean i'm afraid of being alone? maybe. probably. or am i compensating for the time i waste lazing in bed or prowling about when i should have been doing something else? again, most likely. is it something i should change? that remains to be seen.