really, i am never satisfied. i swore i would never do it again, and there i was. just because i heard the prof say that he was gonna pick up the papers on saturday morning.
backtrack: on friday night the paper was not even half done. sure i have all the research ready and web pages saved in my trusty flash drive. at eight i went to the school library, hoping to get myself in the mood (and get half the paper done in an hour would you believe?). but no, i ended up surfing. sure, i was looking up the share price of RIM and the website of the bureau of treasury, which wouldn't load. every excuse i could think of... pretending to work on my paper when i really am not.
at quarter to nine i resigned to the fact that i am so bushed. i had slept only three hours the night before and i am not functioning normally. i ended up at powerplant, sat on a bench watching passersby, and contemplated my next move. no, i would not go to press cafe and eat my blues away. no, i'm not going window shopping. so i just sat there. until i decided to get a cup of my favorite black cherry mocha at seattle's before i finally went home.
i got back to the dorm at past ten, and settled myself at the head of the dining table. i didn't even go up to my room to get dressed, i just scattered my papers and prepared to write. but not a word came out of my head. damn. massive mental block. i couldn't make sense out of my report! i ended up doing other stuff, like cleaning up my room and watching tv. and napping in front of the tv.
three a.m.! is that the time? omg i have to get out of here. i have to go to the computer shop and get it done by seven. so, finally, i got hold of my wandering mind and got down to business. i was panicking by 6.59, but i knew i was near the finish line. by 8.30 i was ready to print. i kept scaring myself with the thought that i would see an empty pigeonhole when i got to school, or worse, i would cross paths with my prof on the way up. fortunately none of that happened; all the papers i saw last night were still there, and i didn't even have a glimpse of the prof. so i rewarded myself with a breakfast at gram's before preparing for my long journey home.
lessons? i kept going back to the fact that i didn't have my own laptop, so i can carry it anywhere and do my thing in a conducive environment (like the library on thursday instead of going back home). but on friday i was ready to settle for a good old desktop in my room. imagine if i had to do this every time i have a paper due for strama class. it would be a nightmare! of course, i also realize that it's not the things i don't have that hinder me, though a laptop would really be a great help. i have to change my habits, and i mean major overhaul. i can just imagine what this next term is going to be like...
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