isang himig

maligayang araw ng kasarinlan!

naging maugong ang usap-usapan dahil sa patakaran ng kasalukuyang pangulo na ilipat ang araw ng bakasyon na dapat sana ay ngayon. hindi na ako sasali dyan. basta ang mahalaga ay maintindihan ng bawat pilipino kung ano ang nangyari noong ika-12 ng hunyo 1898 at bakit ito mahalaga sa ating kasaysayan. pwede naman nating gawin yon, ke me pasok ba o wala.

nakita ko ang YM status ng isa kong kaklase, at napaisip ako kung ano bang magandang OPM na kanta (kasi kadalasan ay titik ng kanta ang ginagawa kong status). naalala ko tuloy noong nag farewell concert kami sa glee club noong high school, kasi ang huling bahagi ay puro tagalog na kanta. at ito ang isa sa pinakapaborito namin na piyesa.

isang dugo, isang lahi, isang musika

nalito pa ako, kasi alam ko na hindi "isang dugo, isang lahi at musika" ang pamagat nito (kahit yon ang nasa loob ng kanta). ayon sa philmusicregistry.net, ito ay nilikha ni dodjie simon (medyo mabenta ang mamang ito) at kinanta ni richard reynoso sa album niya noong 1991. ayon naman kay eric (http://greyone.blogspot.com/2007/02/idilim.html) eh nanalo ito ng ikalawang pwesto sa isang patimpalak. basta ang alam ko, 1994 noong una ko itong napag-aralan, at ito ay ang version ng philippine madrigal singers. yata.

isang tinig ang aking narinig
minsa'y nanaginip ating mundo'y umaawit
isang himig, pag-ibig ang hatid
ang musika'y batid sa bawat puso at isip

ikaw at ako, tayo ay Pilipino
isang bansa, ba't di magkaisa?
isang dugo, isang lahi at musika
ang pangarap ko'y bansang mapayapa

isang tinig ang aking narinig
pag-ibig ang hatid sa bawat puso at isip
isang awit ang aking dalangin
kristiyano at muslim
magkaisa sa awitin

ang galing no? at sa totoo lang, parang hindi lumipas ang panahon. ganito pa rin tayo hanggang ngayon. halos dalawang dekada na, pero ang gulo pa rin ng bansa natin. sana naman ay matuto na tayo sa mga aral na dulot ng kasaysayan. bow.

salamat kay mahalamanda.multiply.com dahil sa kanya ako nakakuha ng kopya ng kanta.

aaaargh

still doing the revisions, which should be submitted by saturday... ohhhh brother. here i go again.

still obsessing on my (incomplete) ai7 playlist.

still unable to scrobble my ipod on last.fm. why why why why???????? the problem started when i upgraded my software, then the scrobbling became patchy until it stopped altogether, then i upgraded my itunes, then i downgraded my last.fm software. nothing. i'm holding off
upgrading my ipod software though, i tried it today but my connection gave up. whuh. so, that's the biggest annoyance right now, bigger than the revisions. lol.

just posted my summer movie wishlist on my blogspot. so it's no longer summer here in the islands, so what? this is the start of MY summer. i wish there's a portable widget for lists though. so that i can just put them in my lj if i so choose. heh. like i've already managed to configure the sidebar already.

i am sleepy. even if it was already monday (actually, it's tuesday already) i still did my sleepless sunday bit. hurray for long weekends! the next one is probably late august, oh dear.

so good night, i have to brace myself for the new day :D (and the new workweek, traffic is gonna be hell urgh).

techie questions

my latest object of obsession in the internets is the last.fm application. it's cool tracking everything i've ever played on my ipod and at the itunes at work. i just wish the tagging for past tracks is easier, my connection especially at work is spotty at best. and it's tiring to have to tag every single track one by one. i hope they put in a mass tagging feature soon. (if you're on last.fm, check out my profile from the link at the right. -->)

i also just bought a new hard disk casing for the 80 gb hard drive i got last year - the one that was in danger of expiring before its time. it turned out the problem was in the casing and not really the hard disk, though i guess its days are numbered with the several drops (oops!) i've subjected it to. and that's why i bought a new 160 gb my passport. with all the movies i'll be ripping for the ipod, i'll probably need the extra storage soon.

which brings me to my next problem, which is a FREE dvd ripper that can rip by chapter. it's for the sting concert videos that i want to rip by song. so, help?

and i just also got into del.icio.us, which is a wonderful tagging device since my firefox bookmark list is loooooooooong. but who knows when i'll eventually transfer them to del.icio.us. bahhhhhh.

it don't matter, it's over

i just surpassed the biggest challenge of my life, and i can't find words good enough to describe it.

after years of ranting, worrying, and even crying over my strategic management paper, i finally faced the defense panel yesterday. anyone who's seen me in the last few days know just how worried i was over it. to be more precise, it was a very irrational fear bordering on phobia. not without reason. though. stories about failing defense because of unsatisfactory explanations are part and parcel of every strama student's nightmare. especially mine, because i've always been non-confrontational, i've never felt able to defend my own opinions in real life and the idea that my own graduation depends on this skill is just incomprehensible. and downright scary.

this whole experience probably reinforced my sometimes shaky faith in god. especially with that irrational fear threatening to take over, it was my faith that kept me strong. and passing all those fears and worries to his mercy helped me a lot during the actual presentation. i managed to present an calm facade to my professor, and even chatted with him and my panel (who happened to be previous teachers of mine) while waiting to begin. even when i got stumped occasionally and had to defend several ratings i made (this was the one thing i was specifically afraid of), i found myself going through it without breaking down in hysterical sobs. anyway, obviously i passed. (there, i said it.) and even with the revisions i have to make, i have the license to get on with the rest of my life. finally.

so, many things i want to do. i've already done one, which was get my hair cut much shorter. (it's like a pledge or something with myself. no drastic changes until i'm done with the biggie.) i've also a few meet-ups on the drawing board with friends, movies and theatre to see (mike's been bugging me forever to see the farewell staging of avenue q), and driving lessons to finally get around to. and i swear to finally have a social life, and i mean the dating kind. no more excuses ;)

i don't know yet if i'm qualified for graduation this august (rules and stuff). to be quite honest, i don't care as much as i did before - after everything i had to contend with, i'm just thankful i'm actually at this point and i just wish there'll be no more problems standing in my way. but i still hope i get the chance to march this year, that would be really great.

my david cook playlist

these are actually songs in my playlist that i think david cook will totally nail. and who knows, maybe he's sung some of them already. it's not far out actually (he sang collective soul, man!)

1. stone temple pilots, interstate love song
2. bush, comedown
3. don henley/the ataris, the boys of summer
4. the calling, stigmatized
5. live, selling the drama (or all over you)
6. jeff buckley, last goodbye
7. greenwheel, breathe
8. dishwalla, somewhere in the middle (or any of the others: angels or devils, home, counting blue cars.)
9. lifehouse, spin
10. foo fighters, everlong (acoustic version)
11. goo goo dolls, black balloon
12. switchfoot, on fire (or only hope. i can't believe he likes mandy moore! lol!)
13. u2, new year's day (or one, stay... the list is endless. he can do bono!)
14. the police, tea in the sahara (or anything really)
15. the who, won't get fooled again

i wonder what he'll pick?

a short - and very much delayed - american idol post-mortem

so, david cook won. for the first time, someone i was betting on with all my heart finally won one of these reality singing competitions. even if simon cowell totally owned the title "master manipulator" with the reverse psychology pimping omg.

i actually had mixed feelings about him winning instead of archie. there is still some sort of stigma attached to the show, and there is the danger of too much pimping and unfulfilled expectations. taylor hicks ring any bells? i also felt a little bad for archie, because he needed the win more than cookie did. but it's done, and i can only hope for the best for those two and the other finalists.

so, my favorite performances on ai season 7:

1. top 8, seasons of love - it seriously gave me goosebumps the first time i saw the video. even if kristy had a louder mic and brooke didn't have a solo part.
2. michael johns, across the universe - i didn't know this song except as a title for that movie. i looooove this performance.
3. brooke white, let it be - i'm sure she was genuinely thrilled to perform this song on top 12.
4. jason castro, hallelujah - if only because he bumped jeff buckley to #2 on itunes! but jason's a unique singer as well.
5. brooke white, love is a battlefield - another song i was introduced to this season.
6. david cook, happy together - lss factor! this first performance of david is a precursor of great things to come.
7. david cook, billie jean - anybody with the guts to bring chris cornell into ai has my utmost admiration.
8. david cook, music of the night - no, david cook is not a fluke. nor is he a boring rocker. he has serious vocal chops man.
9. david cook, first time ever i saw your face - hay naku kaka inlove ka talaga.
10. david cook, the world i know - this is why i decided that david cook is the best representation of the kind of music i go for. aside from chris daughtry, who else in the whole idol history could be counted on to bring in chris cornell, switchfoot and collective soul? obviously, wala. and this song is actually one of the best songs of the 90s alternative rock - i rank it up there with last goodbye in the senti factor. at buti na lang cookie left this song for the last, it made listening to this song all the more poignant because of the wait. omg david i so love you for that. thank you.

btw, idol gives back is such a disappointing show performance-wise, but the finale made up for it. especially archie's duet with onerepublic (this is the sort of song david archuleta would do really well in) and the "audition tape" for gladys knight and the pips. jack black you are so hilarious!

and i feel fine

so that took three years. i had a friend who was dragging her master's thesis and we all kept pestering her to finish it. eventually she did. i really know how she feels.

i have just submitted my mba paper last night. i don't think it's really sunk in yet that i am finally free. some of the 50-random-things-to-do-after-strama were popping up in my head last night, but i can't really grasp them. i do know that one i'll be doing pretty soon is visit my friend who just gave birth, and probably another is get a whole lot of sleep. because i now have the mother of all headaches, and not involving alcohol in it only made it marginally better. i also have a crick in my neck that is just pain.

though i've been already warned of an impending outing with classmates. out of town, with planes and accomodations involved. one of the things i missed out on while i was doing my penance from hell. and now i'm doing it. yay.

so, actually i'm not completely free of grad school yet, defense is still in the horizon. and it's the one thing that really scared me shitless in my last semesters attending class (which was already three years ago). and it's probably the underlying reason why i never got to this point much much earlier. i'll probably get the nerves again when i finalize my schedule, but right now, i just can't care less.

wangsting temporarily banned from my life. the world is just an intriguing shade of pink for me right now. and for now i can say with utter conviction: THANK GOD IT'S FRIDAY.

all right now

snatching some time for some dc:

my idol manok, david cook, will be singing collective soul's the world i know next week (it was his song choice).

i've loved that song ever since it came out back when i was in high school/freshman college? it's seriously one of my favorites. omg i really really really love you dc i can't say it enough.

so with that, i am now trying to convince myself he's going to sing it badly so that i'll not expect too much from the performance (and consequently enjoy it as it is). at least my peculiar musical tastes are represented this year. god i miss rockstar.

and logan, you're gonna love this: jeff archuleta banned from david's practice. stage dad fallout much? kawawa naman si archie. and no, i don't think TPTB will kick him out. the money potential of a david vs david finale is incomprehensible.

for the deets:
www.rickey.org
www.myfoxkc.com

songs of the week: david cook, all right now; michael johns, across the universe (grabe caloy naging lss namin to ni anne kasalanan mo to)

i'm a believer

whenever i know i needed to write something, i end up writing a whole lot of nonsense on my blog instead. and now that i have twitter, i update as well. funnnnnnnn.

---

i blog because i want to be heard. because i don't feel i'm heard enough in real life. like everything just goes on whether i'm there or just sitting in the sidelines. which i am most of the time.

and i put my feelings out there, somebody hears, but i don't feel like anyone's listening. do i expect too much from people? from some people, who don't even care?

or am i deaf to the people who really care, the ones who listen but dare not speak, for some reason?

comments of the day:
from the blog of rhojmp3downloads.multiply.com

commenter a: ...anyway, that priscilla betetr learn how to LISTEN. listen to other people's side before doing something else.

commenter b: paano naman niya magagawa yan...bingi nga

[/crack]

on tv this week, and it's only wednesday

today on american idol, i was a little bit disappointed in david cook's performance. thats the problem whenever i look at rickey.org and see great reviews, i almost always end up a little deflated seeing the actual performance. also, minor gripe: baba o'riley was TOO SHORT. how many seconds did that clock in, hello? hungry like a wolf could have been better, but at least that was a little more upbeat. but i still love him. go cookies!

and, PUSHING DAISIES finally here! saw the first episode this morning, at 4 am (i missed the primetime). i seriously dig them both. anna friel is adorable! she would've made a good tonks, i think, and we'd have all dissolved in the utter romance of it all.

wtf? (i fail at life)

seven days.

blah blah blah and all that shite.

this is it, this is the moment, this is the wtfery.

i will not, i mean NOT call lei/mike/whoever and crycrycry again.

...

so please please please let me let me let me
let me get what i want this time
- the smiths

whine, whine, whine

it's hot out. it's cold in here. i have fever, my frap is melting.

so instead of going home right away since i first felt this weird temperature disparity, i chose to stay. when i badly needed sleep. and with no ready cash. but a few weeks ago, i decided to go home in the midst of a really freaking hot summer afternoon (it was after one pm, go figure) having the same symptoms and i wasn't happy at all. so i decided to try the other way for now, and waited for the free ride home. (because luckily, today, i get a free ride home.).

i should have just stayed home and not spent as much money. too late for that. and to think the initial reason i took a sick day (originally a half-day, but circs have a way of going awry) is no longer itching to make its presence known. it lends credence to the popular school of thought that illness is largely psychological. just when the theory that the little buggers were living the high life in my epidermis has been dashed, once and for all, it's like i'm reborn. but i could have done without the flames from fawkes, thank you.

ok, i've spent two hours sitting like a good lamb in this sofa chair, no complaints. no highlights, either. just some good 'zine fodder and fern's latest teddy chapter. i have at least an hour left to go before i'm saved. ohhhhhh brother.

meme

picked up from wildmagelet. at first i couldn't figure it out, haha. especially since i found myself having a lot of answers in common with hers.

1. A body of water, smaller than a river, contained within relatively narrow banks.
- also creek
2. What the thing you push around the grocery store is called.
- a cart
3. A metal container to carry a meal in.
- also lunch box, if it's an actual box. if it's a plastic container, it's tupperware. hehehe.
4. The thing that you cook bacon and eggs in.
- we also call it frying pan here
5. The piece of furniture that seats three people.
- mostly we call it sofa, but couch is also becoming more common
6. The device on the outside of the house that carries rain off the roof.
- haha i don't know, in filipino we call it alulod
7. The covered area outside a house where people sit in the evening.
- if it's at the front, it's a porch. at the back, it's a terrace. hanging, it's a balcony.
8. Carbonated, sweetened, non-alcoholic beverages.
- softdrink, or more commonly, by their proper brand. coke or pepsi.
9. A flat, round breakfast food served with syrup.
- pancakes/hotcakes
10. A long sandwich designed to be a whole meal in itself.
- submarine? i actually thought Subway subs. or just plain sandwich. but if it's hotdog, it's called hotdog sandwich. heheh.
11. The piece of clothing worn by men at the beach.
- swim trunks... but on second thought, guys here don't wear trunks unless they're competing in a swim meet. so maybe shorts.
12. Shoes worn for sports.
- rubber shoes
13. Putting a room in order.
- cleaning
14. A flying insect that glows in the dark.
- firefly
15. The little insect that curls up into a ball.
- whuh? i don't know this one
16. The children's playground equipment where one kid sits on one side and goes up while the other sits on the other side and goes down.
- seesaw
17. How do you eat your pizza?
- if in a restaurant, with a fork and knife. if at home, straight from the box to my mouth. or on a plate, sometimes.
18. What's it called when private citizens put up signs and sell their used stuff?
- garage sale
19. What's the evening meal?
- supper, but here it's mostly called dinner.
20. The thing under a house where the furnace and perhaps a rec room are?
- basement. but we don't have furnaces.
21. What do you call the thing that you can get water out of to drink in public places?
- i know we also call it something other than fountain, but i don't remember.
I Am: a filipino currently living in the philippines, and we learned english the way most americans speak it on tv.

last day of the week

living in a predominantly christian country has its benefits. like having this long weekend before easter. the work week officially ends today, but even better, it's a half day at the office. yay!

since i'm not really inclined to do anything remotely related to work, i'm posting a couple of memes from my f-list.

this one's from sciathan_file:

Everyone has things they blog about. Everyone has things they don't blog about. Challenge me out of my comfort zone by telling me something I don't blog about, but you'd like to hear about, and I'll write a post about it. Ask for anything: latest movie watched, last book read, political leanings, thoughts on yaoi, favorite type of underwear, graphic techniques, etc. Repost in your own journal so that we can all learn more about each other.

and this one from a pretty happy ladybracknell

1. I've come to realize that my ex... might probably never exist in my life. hah.
2. I am listening to... someone else's playlist
3. I talk... mostly on YM, with alohachary1851
4. I love... staying up late doing virtually nothing. productive, that is.
5. My best friends... have gotten married or are about to be married. suddenly i realized how empty my social life is.
6. My first real kiss... is yet to happen. pathetic.
7. I lost my virginity... in my dreams, to this guy i had a really big crush on during high school senior year.
8. I hate it when people... don't have a sense of urgency
9. Love is... a very very very elusive dream
10. Marriage is... something you work on every day
11. Somewhere, someone is thinking... it's too hot for any kind of travel
13. I have a secret crush on... this really cute guy i used to work with.
14. The last time I cried was because... my mum made me.
15. My cell phone... is a really old clamshell (nokia 7200) that i only borrowed from my aunt because my newest one was stolen
16. When I wake up in the morning... i pick up my cell and press snooze
17. Before I go to sleep at night... i pray (if i'm awake enough to remember)
18. Right now I am thinking about... facebook. and this fic i'm working on.
19. What should question 19 be? I regret.... so many little things in life that i can't count.
20. I get on LiveJournal... almost all the time, if i'm on internet
21. Today, I... am waiting to end this half-day i had to stay at the office (well, i'm still lucky we're going to be sent home early...) and then head on to greenbelt and see if there's confession at the chapel.
22. Tonight, I will... pack my management book in my suitcase. i'm going out of town with the family tomorrow.
23. Tomorrow, I will... be catching the flight to cagayan de oro city. and hopefully work on my paper while my mum is doing her "retreat"
24. I really want... to be done with strama. so that i can finally have the social life without the guilt.
25. The person most likely to repost this is... probably chary, and metawolfmagus

advanced happy easter everyone!

burning the midnight oil

omg this is just. too. silly. a result of two hours of sleep the previous night, all-around fatigue, and trying to stay up and study the night away. a saturday night at that.

it actually starts midnight saturday/sunday.

countdown to an hour

12.02 on my laptop's clock. let's see if i can last an hour before succumbing to sleep.

12.36 i'm still alive, a bit more than barely, though every minute is a test made from hell. started playing my ipod connected to a speaker... "are you all right?" ron asked the beuatiful girl, he know wthat molly would do us in your pants later akoo.


i hope thie se-

dang i hate closing my eyes on my late, somdd

and definete;u you can secon nad straten you hair. it is siend


12.41 (omg what kind of sentence was that????) i kept changing up the songs on my ipod so that i can finally reached his hand, whoever thought to Im[erius her, but that would mean too much, they were plasiging and dad

12.43 i swear i am doing more to this entry, which i shall say, that harry, he know you are no problem. ron and hermione, this is what we cam here

12.44 man sleep... i really need it, after only two hours last niiiiiiiiiiight

so. did it make any sense? i though not. i mean, anything at all that doesn't make sense, like the harry potter references... that's the sleep talking. hahahahahaha.

i. am. so. annoyed.

my external hard disk refuses to work. all my mp3s are in there. *weeps*

i'm with stupid

it's another friday afternoon, and i'm waiting - impatiently - for the clock to point to 530.

it's been a not-so-good day all around. i just want to go home. i'm tired, cranky, and feel so, so stupid. and for the hundred thousandth time, wishing that my strama is over and done with . so i can get on with the rest of my life.

just a little bit of jkr pimpin'

take a break, have a kitkat.

http://www.bworldonline.com/Weekender012508/main.php?id=environment4

three in a row

meme doing the rounds at lj, nicked from ladybracknell and metawolfmagus

THREE NAMES YOU GO BY:
1. kristin
2. tin
3. definitely not mae

THREE SCREEN NAMES YOU HAVE HAD:
1. emmerdale
2. politics aside
3. under crisis

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF: (this is a bit difficult)
1. that i can carry a computer monitor by myself
2. ?
3. ?

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU DON'T LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
1. that i was never thin (though when i look at my hs pictures now i envy that kid)
2. i get tired too easily
3. too many things vying for this spot

THREE PARTS OF YOUR HERITAGE:
1. a great part of my family tree goes back to visayas
2. we have a smallish hill behind the house
3. (ngerh brain dead)

THREE THINGS THAT SCARE YOU:
1. horror movies. i don't watch them.
2. failure
3. being alone in the world

THREE OF YOUR EVERYDAY ESSENTIALS:
1. music, especially now that i have my ipod *win*
2. either vito on the morning radio show or dos por dos on am radio
3. coffee

THREE THINGS YOU ARE WEARING NOW:
1. my glasses
2. an orange striped hoodie
3. my orange crocs

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE BANDS OR MUSICAL ARTISTS:
1. everything but the girl
2. sting
3. radiohead

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE SONGS (RIGHT NOW):
1. umbrella, scott simon's version most especially
2. so sick, fall out boy's version
3. do it, nelly furtado

THREE THINGS YOU WANT IN A RELATIONSHIP:
1.
2.
3. (this is the reason i'm not even in a relationship)

TWO TRUTHS AND A LIE, IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER:
1. i'm addicted to harry potter fan fiction.
2. i'm addicted to soda (i'd have said coke, but i don't want to confuse)
3. i'm happy

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS ABOUT THE PREFERRED SEX THAT APPEAL TO YOU:
1. looks like a college boy
2. tall
3. neat looking

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE HOBBIES:
1. reading
2. surfing net
3. watching tv

THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO REALLY BADLY RIGHT NOW:
1. not have this strama hanging over my head
2. get down to my strama assignments
3. sleep

THREE CAREERS YOU'RE CONSIDERING/YOU'VE CONSIDERED:
1. be in a band
2. advice columnist
3. professional beta reader hahahaha

THREE PLACES YOU WANT TO GO ON VACATION:
1. rome
2. london
3. wales (only if chary is with me hehehehe)

THREE NAMES YOU LIKE:
1. alexandra
2. anne
3. remus john :D

THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE:
1. travel around the world
2. have my mum and dad and aunt and uncles be taken care of
3. fall in love for real

THREE WAYS THAT YOU ARE STEREOTYPICALLY A GIRL:
1. fangirling over cute guys
2. romance novel addict
3. i love big bags

THREE WAYS THAT YOU ARE STEREOTYPICALLY A BOY:
1. my style idol is ellen degeneres
2. i love gadgets
3. i'm not very girly in general

THREE PEOPLE THAT YOU WOULD LIKE TO SEE TAKE THIS QUIZ NOW:
1. chary
2. mike :D
3. sirius black hahahaha

unlucky

WEASLEY LOVE: YOUR WEASLEY FUTURE
LJ Username
you'll have your first kiss with	ron
you'll have your first crush on	george
this weasley secretly adores you	percy
you will date	percy
you marry	george
happily ever after?	(8) - My reply is no. - (8)
This fun quiz by iluvronweasley - Taken 933 Times.

Get Free
Daily Horoscopes from Kwiz.Biz

well, what did i expect, george ended up with angelina, not me. ngrhhhhh.

whaddya know?

nicked from metawolfmagus

Harry Potter Character Combatibility Test created with QuizFarm.com

You scored as Neville Longbottom You are Neville Longbottom. You come across as shy, quiet, and reserved. Underneath, you are deeply caring of your friends and/or family and would put yourself at risk to defend them, even though you would usually exclude yourself from arguments. You don't care much for competition or glory. Maintaining peace and justice are much more important to you. Neville Longbottom 91% Remus Lupin 88% Albus Dumbledore 75% Ron Weasley 72% Luna Lovegood 69% Severus Snape 59% Draco Malfoy 53% Harry Potter 47% Percy Weasley 47% Hermione Granger 47% Bellatrix Lestrange 38% Oliver Wood 34% Sirius Black 28% Lord Voldemort 19%

oh well, i knew there was a reason i loved neville so much. and remus!!!! ohmygodohmygodohmygod *grins*

blah

What Kristin Means

You are a seeker of knowledge, and you have learned many things in your life. You are also a keeper of knowledge - meaning you don't spill secrets or spread gossip. People sometimes think you're snobby or aloof, but you're just too deep in thought to pay attention to them. You are wild, crazy, and a huge rebel. You're always up to something. You have a ton of energy, and most people can't handle you. You're very intense. You definitely are a handful, and you're likely to get in trouble. But your kind of trouble is a lot of fun. You tend to be pretty tightly wound. It's easy to get you excited... which can be a good or bad thing. You have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. You don't stick with any one thing for very long. You have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time. Your biggest problem is making sure you finish the projects you start. You are the total package - suave, sexy, smart, and strong. You have the whole world under your spell, and you can influence almost everyone you know. You don't always resist your urges to crush the weak. Just remember, they don't have as much going for them as you do. You are a seeker. You often find yourself restless - and you have a lot of questions about life. You tend to travel often, to fairly random locations. You're most comfortable when you're far away from home. You are quite passionate and easily tempted. Your impulses sometimes get you into trouble. You are very intuitive and wise. You understand the world better than most people. You also have a very active imagination. You often get carried away with your thoughts. You are prone to a little paranoia and jealousy. You sometimes go overboard in interpreting signals.

What's Your Name's Hidden Meaning?

ok, so two out of the six paragraphs are a bit iffy (nos. 2 and 4)but the other four are spot on.

a funny thing happened on my way to the office

before anything else, i'm pimping my friend chary's new lj comm, gingersnaps_fic, which is where she's posting this whole saga of gingers from harry potter. i'll leave you to discover just who's on there. suffice to say this is what i'm into 24/7, basically doing beta work and being the wall (where she bounces ideas off of).

oh, since i already upgraded my lj account to plus, i get to post this by email. same as with my two other blogs. yippee. no more website problems, hopefully. now i just have to master the lj-cut.

so, friday last week. i tuned in to mornings at maxville just in time. vito and tetta have been pimping this show over the last few days, because they have a guest coming in: a psychic/clairvoyant going by the name angel. who just happens to be on the phonebook of several politicians and big-name networks, and whose mobile will ring even at odd hours of the night. that's how in demand she is.

obviously, angel is there primarily to give some general predictions to ring in the new year, and some specific predictions for the resident skeptic, vito. and if time allows, even the listeners of the show. so they invited said listeners to text in their names and birthdays, and their specific query if they have one. since they said the magic word, this minion sent her name and birthday, and no specific question since she was curious what angel will think is a significant matter for her. and then i waited.

it didn't take long. after vito's enviable forecast (like, hello, if someone told you to trust your instincts because you'll hardly get it wrong, expect everyone else to be green), tetta announced that they picked two listeners off the list of many (i assumed) texters. and the lucky person who got first mention was me (surprise!) i don't remember the specifics, but the gist is that this might be a good year to look for a new job or some other line of work, or get into some new moneymaking scheme. but the clincher was, angel also said that my work right now is b-o-r-i-n-g. i swear i almost laughed out loud in the car, and i was listening though my headset!

honestly, i don't put too much store in predictions, horoscopes and the like. i'm not one of those people who would pay good money to have my fortune read from tarot cards. but i don't reject them outright either. one of my biggest character traits (which i acknowledge is that of a typical libra) is believing any argument that has a logical basis or explanation. even if two opposite arguments are presented to me, i have the tendency to believe both, with some twisted logic in my head connecting them. actually it's quite simplistic, i just think that every side of an argument always has a basis, even if the conclusion itself is faulty. so the gist of that pretty convoluted rambling is that i can believe anything. and in that vein, i still believe, somewhat, in fortunetelling, but my own interpretation of that belief is that 1) i can always spin a prediction to mean several different things, and it can always apply, and 2) it is ultimately my choice. no matter what the foretune teller tells you to do, if it's not in you to do it, then it won't happen. and i'm stopping here before i start getting confused in my own logic.

and the last funny thing, which happened when i'm at the office, is that my officemate (who also listens to the program) asked me if i'm going to look for a new job. secret!

stay awake

this is the first time in the last few years that i've been this excited about christmas. maybe it's the ipod i'm supposed to be getting (which i haven't yet... grrr :D). but other than that, i really don't know what's different about this year. i just feel different for some reason.

i've taken the next few days off, which are the last few days of the year here in my part of the world. the 30th and 31st are official holidays, and since the 29th falls on a saturday, this means there are three days left for the year. yay. it just so happens that i have 3 days' leave left for this year.

i've not been expecting too much for this christmas, hence i wasn't disappointed with it like i felt the last few years. my goddaughters liked the presents i gave them, thankfully. and the family gatherings were all happy. i even got to take some naps, which i chose over internet time because sleep was a rare luxury in the last few days. i also got to watch mythbusters with my cousins, and we were laughing at the holiday-themed shenanigans of jamie, adam, tori, grant andkari. and then, to really make my day, i finally got to read my christmas present from alohachary1851. all those days i chatted with her while i'm at work lead to that very cute charlie/tonks story, an outtake on her mating of the wersh alternate universe. thanks for a lovely gift, chary!

my biggest achievement for this christmas, though, is completing the nine novena dawn masses, called simbang gabi, for the first time in my life. i have to thank my parents for that, too, for waking me up at an ungodly hour to make the 4 am mass. i didn't care that i seriously lacked sleep over the week this went on, and that i wasn't being my best self in the mornings. i finally finished it, and before i turn 30.

oh, and i think chocolate is the sole reason for holiday weight gain. especially if chocolate fountains are involved.

merry christmas to all!

listening to: punk goes 90's; radiohead, in rainbows; dashboard confessional, the shade of poison trees; foo fighters, echoes, silence, patience, & grace

it's you i fell into

picked this up from ladybracknell over at lj, again.

Comment on this post and I'll give you a band. Don't worry, I'll make it one you know and love. You put your ten favorite songs by that band on your LJ, then challenge others to do the same.

she picked foo fighters. although i love them to bits, i don't really know much of the songs beyond what became singles. like, haha. so i did a bit of review of in your honor as it is the only complete album i had.

1. everlong (a favorite song i apparently share with david letterman)
2. big me (the first foo song i performed with my high school band :D)
3. i'll stick around (the first foo song my band practiced)
4. times like these
5. dave's cover of arms wide open
6. learn to fly
7. miracle
8. walking after you
9. the deepest blues are black
10. best of you

if anything, i got to listen to the album in full once again. oh, can't wait for my new ipod.

train_lindz , meanwhile, picked radiohead. which i honestly thought was much easier, until i realized this would almost read like the tracklisting for the bends. which is the only album i really swear by.

1. black star
2. high and dry
3. just
4. my iron lung
5. thinking about you
6. karma police
7. everything in its right place
8. street spirit (fade out)
9. the bends
10. bones planet telex fake plastic trees

and metawolfmagus kindly gave a challenge of her own, and picked the police. so here goes:

1. king of pain
2. every little thing she does is magic
3. tea in the sahara
4. synchronicity II
5. message in a bottle
6. every breath you take
7. don't stand so close to me (especially the '86 version)
8. roxanne
9. so lonely
10. wrapped around your finger

you keep me hanging on but we're not moving on

happy happy day! it's the third time i've listened to vito's broadcast on the revamped 1035 max fm. today's the first time i lasted the whole 3-hour slot. i've really missed the stuff he plays, and i missed the understated wit. hopefully he'll get a regular spot soon.

btw when he read my message over the air he referred to me as an old old friend. well, he does seem like a friend to me already, after four years of being a regular listener to the morning brew. 'la lang, guess i'm really flattered.

here's my song for the day. vito played this song around noon, and it just struck me. not a particularly significant song in terms of message, just an upbeat angsty song... i do seem to like those a lot.

she calls me baby
then she won't call me
says she adores me
and then ignores me
(jenny, what's the problem?)

she keeps her distance
and sits on fences
puts up resistance
and builds defenses
(jenny, what's the problem?)

you keep me hanging on the line
everytime you change your mind

first you say you won't
then you say you will
you keep me hanging on
but we're not moving on
we're standing still
jenny, you've got me on my knees
jenny, it's killing me

she needs her own space
she's playing mind games
ends up at my place
saying that she's changed
(jenny, what's the problem?)

i'm trying to read between the lines
you got me going out of my mind

first you say you won't
then you say you will
you keep me hanging on
but we're not moving on
we're standing still
jenny, you've got me on my knees
jenny, it's killing me

-- the click five, jenny

the end is the beginning is the end, and it stinks

there's so much i want to write about harry potter. i know, it's been a month since i read deathly hallows. i have since read all the others, haphazardly though. but i seriously need an outlet for my angst (i am such a fangirl) because it's seriously interfering with my long-delayed schoolwork.

let's talk about that greasy-haired git. one of my favorite lines has got to be the one on my homepage. snape has been one of my favorite characters, precisely because he was a character. he's not like wise old dumbledore, the spinster aunt-ish mcgonagall, the overly confident yet bitter sirius, the paranoia-inducing mad-eye... the list could go on and on. he's not overly impressed with harry -- well, he's not overly impressed with most people -- and even dumbledore was not spared his sparkling wit.

"would you like me to do it now? or would you like a few moments to compose an epitaph?"

it's rather disturbing to be reminded of his capacity for hatred and revenge. but then why be surprised, knowing how appallingly he was treated when he was a student, even beforehand. the character of snape is deliciously complex, in toeing the very fine line between good and evil, and knowing that sometimes it really is what we value most that makes all the difference. jo did a great job picking alan rickman as snape. alan is such a great actor, plus he does get the mumbling down pat. and oh god, he and the hair are like an old married couple. whenever i think back to love actually and his scenes with laura linney, he possesses the right amount of sarcasm needed to take on snape. snape needs load of it.

like harry, i thought the appearance of sirius in his life was far too short. the battle at the department of mysteries was definitely a three-hanky moment, which extends after harry's rage and grief has been spent somewhat. but in the grand scheme of things, sirius has served his purpose: to reveal the truth of what happened that halloween night, to be a proper (or not) godfather and friend to harry, to help along the revival of the order of the phoenix. i'm sad that i missed seeing the movie while it was showing at the cinemas, because even though i thought gary oldman was downright spooky when i saw prisoners of azkaban, i looked forward to hearing that maniacal laugh when sirius went through the veil.

finally, remus and tonks. i so did not see that coming at the end of half-blood prince. but when i reviewed the archive on fanfiction.net, stories on them started appearing even before the release date of hbp. since i went about reading the series in the wrong order (pun not intended), i wasn't sure if they weren't being set up since tonks first appeared on ootp, or if it was just wishful thinking. so anyway, they are my current flames. the dreadful (but understandable) lack of detail about their relationship is a mine of inspiration for fanfic writers, and i am really enjoying all the back stories they made up. it made me realize all the more that i am so into quiet, witty, bookish (as opposed to sporty) guys, but they must have a slightly sarcastic yet excellent sense of humor, originality, and also be a bit of a risk-taker. tall order, i know (again, not intended). and i am a little bit like tonks, especially about the clumsiness (plenty flat-footed), the music, and being a tomboy. not as brave as her, though.

so, the point of all of this is... i love tonks and remus! (can't deny it, i am a fangirl.)

i dream of jeannie

... or cutie pie. yep, the cutie pie. i dreamt of him again. can't divulge much of what happened, partly because of privacy issues (mine), partly because of secrecy issues (like, someone is bound to get it, and i'm busted), but mostly because i can't remember much.

but from what i do recall, several kilig moments. as if they ever go beyond that. but then, much less in real life!

at least i know that god has a sense of humor. here i am going all crazy, and he gives me comic relief.

so i'm going back to crazy mode again. 24 hours to construct a paper? why do i even bother...

have a break, part n + 1

in honor of a major revamp of my iRiver playlist. here are the newest and most notable additions.

foo fighters, everlong -- this triggered my most recent music recall phase. i'm now going through in your honor after about two years of ignoring the darn mp3s. i'm pretty sure this song will be a subject of a future "songs of my life" post so i won't pre-empt that. but having seven foo songs on my player (plus marty's rockstar inxs performance) is kinda telling how much i like them right now. and this is the first time i heard the original version of times like these (i've only ever heard of the acoustic version, same as everlong) and it rocks.

btw, i read somewhere that when dave letterman came back to his show after having heart surgery or something, he introduced the foos as his favorite band, playing his favorite song, which was everlong.

chris cornell, black hole sun -- i normally stay away from anything chris cornell, but i kinda like this mp3 from the bbc sessions that i picked up over on the office network. there's also a cover of you've got to hide your love away that isn't bad at all.

akon, smack that -- having a seatmate who is into so much r&b and all that kinda stuff sometimes does rub up on you. so maybe i'm a closet r&b junkie (or whatever this stuff is actually called). i always think of it as good driving music.

katharine mcphee, over it -- another great (and most fortunate) find from aforementioned officemate. i just can't get over this song, so lyrics are posted here:

i'm over your lies
and i'm over your games
i'm over you asking me
when you know i'm not okay
you call me at night
and i pick up the phone
and though you be tellin' me
i know you're not alone

oh and that's why your eyes
i'm over it
your smile
i'm over it
realized
i'm over it, i'm over it
i'm over

wanting you to be wanting me
no that ain't no way to be
how i feel, read my lips
because i'm so over
(i'm so)
movin' on, it's my time
you never were a friend of mine
hurt at first, a little bit
but now i'm so over
i'm so over it

i'm over your hands
and i'm over your mouth
trying to drag me down
and fill me with self doubt

oh and that's why your world
i'm over it
so sure
i'm over it
i'm not your girl
i'm over it, i'm over it
i'm over

(oh) don't call, don't come by
ain't no use don't ask me why
you'll never change
there'll be no more crying in the rain
no, oh oh
i'm over it

-- katharine mcphee, over it

thunder only happens when it's raining

i was so running late. i looked through my closet, and couldn't find a single good dress or skirt to wear. finally i remember that i have this sleeveless green top -- definitely a notch up from my usual work duds -- which i paired with black pants when i attended a wedding. both were pressed and ready, and casual enough for the occasion. the place was in shambles from the hurricane that was me getting dressed, clothes strewn haphazardly across the bed and on the floor. my mind was so messed up with putting on the final touches and picking up everything i needed.

suddenly, out of the blue, he appeared. i don't know if he got impatient, or was just plain anxious, or if he just couldn't wait to see me. but he was there, right in front of me, and my heart skipped a beat. he cleaned up really nice. it was the first time i saw him fix up his hair, and i couldn't resist teasing him about it.

it seemed like only seconds, but we must have talked for several minutes before we realized that we had to go. i didn't know where exactly we were going, or what was in store for us, but when he took my hand i knew i made the right choice. we made the right choice. i lead him back to the stairs and out into the world where everything seemed to go our way.

then i opened my eyes, and i knew it was all just wishful thinking.

live earth and no more

i had the time of my life this morning. i spent a part of my sunday hanging out at town center. made darn sure i got my laptop and enough money to buy wifi load, and parked my gear at the coffee bean. while mum read the paper at the next table, i was busy doing what i love doing best -- downloading. and this week's stash: live earth videos.

right this moment i'm watching the beastie boys. not a big big fan, but i do love sabotage (especially the video). so i'm lucky it's in their setlist.

i also downloaded the crowded house performance. neil finn's voice shows his age, but the playing is really, really tight. and i'm impressed with how they went on with the show when the lights (but not the sound) went out. galeeeeeeng.

then there's also the pumpkins (today) and foo fighters, which was my favorite set if only because of everlong. but that's another story.

lastly, the one i was anticipating most was the police. it turned out to be such a disappointment. and it's all because of kanye west. as in, i wish i could just delete him and the whole thing would be heaps better. but i can't.

btw, spinal tap + every bass player in the known universe is a hoot.

---

i got the videos here.

have a break, part n

songs with the most plays on my iRiver

imogen heap, goodnight and go -- obvious ba, my last post was about this.

ben lee, birthday song -- best bud mike told me about his favorite song of the week and sent me a link. then i saw the commercial on etc. ano nga ba yun, one tree hill? di ko akalain nanonood pala non si mike.

maroon 5, makes me wonder & little of your time -- saya kasi, kahit ang weird nung lyrics. nice beat pero angst pala. much like me. i'm sure sawang-sawa na yung nasa kabila ng cubicle wall ko kakarinig sa kin mag-sing along.

barbra streisand & barry gibb, guilty -- i don't like to admit it, but i love 70's music. and the beegees. plus, this song has a hook you can't believe. try listening 3 minutes 27 seconds into the song. i swear, nire-repeat ko talaga yon.

tonic, you wanted more -- ang hilig ko yata talaga dun sa mga songs na upbeat pero malungkot pala. basta.

it's impossible to ignore you

today is the day i finally got my copy of this song. i never really thought whether i liked froufrou, but i was stuck on this song when it came out. then dj uploaded imogen's album a year ago... but i didn't get to download this track, i only managed to get hide and seek. hay, tagal rin bago ko to nahanap. buti na lang talaga may multiply. hehehe.

nga pala, this song is dedicated dun sa cute na cute (oo na, exagg) na guy somewhere. can't tell, baka me makahuli eh. hehehe.

say goodnight and go

skipping beats, blushing cheeks i am struggling
daydreaming bed scenes in the corner cafe
and then i'm left in bits recovering tectonic tremblings
you get me every time

why'd you have to be so cute?
it's impossible to ignore you
must you make me laugh so much?
it's bad enough we get along so well
say goodnight and go

follow you home, you've got your headphones on and you're dancing
got lucky, beautiful shot, you taking everything off, watch the curtains wide open
then you fall in the same routine, flicking through the tv, relaxed and reclining
and you think you're alone...

ch.2

one of these days, you'll miss your train and come stay with me (it's always say goodnight and go) we'll have drinks and talk about things, any excuse to stay awake with you
you'll sleep here, i'll sleep there, but then the heating may be down again (at my convenience)
we'd be good, we'd be great together
*sigh*

ch.3

why's it always always goodnight and go?
oh darling not again
goodnight and go

-- imogen heap, goodnight and go

two princes and some lab rats

it's another sunday. and like every sunday before this one, i get allergic to work of any kind. and i watch lots of tv.

after watching oprah on the hallmark channel, i stuck around for the dateline interview with william and harry. yep, THE william and harry. like most people i'm fascinated with royalty... well, we're all fascinated with what we can never have, right? but as they were sitting there conversing with matt lauer, all i could think of was just how comfortably (or not) they were doing that interview. if i'd been sitting there like that for the time it took me to watch them, i'd be really itching to move. and william isn't as cute as i'd imagined him to be. not all the time, anyway.

good thing axn was just one channel away from hallmark, because during breaks i got to watch csi. tonight they aired the one episode i wanted to see this season: lab rats. the one where the bida aren't the csis or even jim and sofia, but -- you guessed it -- the lab rats. archie kao, wendy sims, some other guy i didn't know, and of course david hodges. i finally understood the fascination some kids over at fanfiction.net had on hodges. and why they raved over this episode. for once, the guys doing the back office work -- where the brilliant greg sanders used to rule when he was dna tech -- got the spotlight. and the writers gave them real cred by leaving hodges to come up with a vital connection for the season's story arc. enough gushing, i'm just waiting for miami ink to come on.

i also got a new keyboard today. not that i'm really pissed with my laptop's keyboard, but the full size one does make an easier time of it. i haven't tried out the number keypad yet, which is the main reason i got this keyboard. i got a number keypad for the laptop a few months ago, and while it's cool to use (especially for us dealing with numbers most of the time), the num lock function takes some getting used to when you're typing letters at the same time. nothing really beats a full-sized keyboard.

lastly, an important update on the blackberry curve, my dream gadget. the next-gen curve, i think it's 8320, will have wifi. thank god. and maybe 3g? hopefully. like, the main use of this gadget for me is mobile surfing! hello?!? plus, the external sd card slot. man, i am so loving this. it's brought me back on steady ground after i saw ziel's o2 xda (the one with the sliding keypad). i was really seriously thinking of getting a touch-screen device instead. or a nokia e61i which loyalists say is just as good as blackberry (among the non-touch screens). so, here i am still, waiting for the perfect timing (and pricing, and budget availability) to get my blackberry.

more than meets the eye

took a break yesterday and spent the whole afternoon bumming... and burned 400 bucks in the process. but who cares, i enjoyed it. seeing the transformers on the big screen is soooo worth it.

galing talaga ni optimus prime.

---

spoiler alert:

during the end credits, the (controversial? at least to purists) songs contributed by linkin park and smashing pumpkins were played. thought they were good, but maybe not spectacular.

the part i loved (or at least remembered, the movie was over 2 hours long) was when the geekboy sam brought his new-second hand yellow 1974 camaro (ring any bells?) to the lakeside, hoping to connect with the hot chick mikaela. just as he thought his chance has slipped away, he sees mikaela starting to walk home. suddenly the car's stereo plays drive by the cars. hahahahaha. this whole sequence was just cute. i just can't remember all the songs played in this sequence, though i still remember marvin gaye's sexual healing somewhere there.

overwhelmed

60 days and counting. well, 30 days if i was batting for the first deadline. but at the rate i'm going, that's fast becoming a remote possibility. and if i keep up like this, i'll be failing the class submissions part. bummer. that gives me a chance in hell that i'll even get a passing mark in strama.

last saturday saw a repeat of the "frantic phone call." this time i called best bud mike. lucky for him i was in a public place or it would have been accompanied with sobs and a flood of tears. i really don't know what i was looking for with that call. maybe i wanted to unload all my frustrations, or to validate that i am not dumb after all. but sometimes, the words "kaya mo yan" can only get you so far.

i don't want to sound like a broken record. and i don't want to be a hypocrite and say that i don't want to involve other people in my mess -- or i shouldn't have said anything about it. but strama is plain driving me nuts. it is testing my patience, my perseverance, my ability to cope with pressure, and my faith. three years is a long time to have this at the back of my mind, and i am plain tired. but my mind and my hands refuse to cooperate.

i kept reminding myself of the things i am free to do once i've finished. catch up with my reading backlog. learn to drive. go out more often. finally be free of guilt. i get on a high, and five minutes later i stand up from my chair and try to walk off my frustration. i just can't see my way through. how my other classmates did is a big mystery. i can't let this hold me back. but at the same time, i wonder if i was even ready for it.

just some buzz

thanks to pk for the video clip of m5's makes me wonder. i couldn't play it on my office pc (it has *gasp!* windows media player 2) and i can't wait until i got home... so i bugged officemate larsen, who also loved the new album, to play it on his pc. most people think adam levine is so hot and i'm no exception. dunno why i brought it up, it's such a boring subject. but sorry, this is my blog so i'll do what i want. so sit tight while i sing along to makes me wonder, live @ aol version. (thanks to doug for this one!)

...

ok, song's done.

---

there's a rumor going around about a hardy boys movie, starring tom cruise and ben stiller. actually, it's almost a done deal. but the general consensus seems to be: take tom out of the project. can't imagine him as frank. really. and he's too short. the fanfic i read suggests keanu reeves as frank and matt damon as joe. i'm not that sold on keanu, either... too brooding (or in pinoy slang, o.a.) i like matt just fine, though owen wilson might be a more obvious choice for joe. and after racking my brains, maybe eric bana for frank. yay! that's because i saw lucky you a few weeks ago. it has to be a perfect match, because i love frank! but right now, it just doesn't look good. what can i expect, since frank didn't end up with nancy...

---

ever since i've heard of blackberry i've always wanted to own one. when before i preferred the look of palm, the new bb models are the machines to beat. i'm currently setting my sights on the newest, the blackberry curve. by the time it gets here or maybe in singapore, i'll hopefully have enough money to get it. i wish.

i know you're there but i'll pretend like i don't care

one of the symptoms you're suffering from heartache is the tendency to identify with every song ever recorded, no matter how far off the mark they were. it's either the sentiments are exactly the same, or it's something you wish you could say if the situation ever arose. this is something i wish he'd say to me. (except for the gender, it's something i wish i could tell him.)

this was also looping in my head (along with makes me wonder) last saturday night. also known as the day of the wedding. (not his, though.) guess this proves that weddings bring out the worst and best of us.

this relationship is over, though my stomach still hurts
and i've wanna live alone, why is the pain much worse
you look so much better without makeup, why would you hide your face
don't wanna spend the night and wake up, realize we made a big mistake

i cannot refuse your eyes
please don't look at me tonight
my heart beats fast, i know you're there
i'll pretend like i don't care
it hurts so bad to know the truth
but i am still in love with you

i never meant to keep you waiting, and now your food is getting cold
i keep denying i'm in love with you, my routine is getting old
now you standin' from the table, you say you'll never look back
do somethin' stupid when you ain't, you only wake up sad

i cannot refuse your eyes
please don't look at me tonight
my heart beats fast, i know you're there
i'll pretend like i don't care
it hurts so bad to know the truth
well girl, i'm still in love with you
it hurts so much to know the truth
well girl, i'm still in love with you

no more kises on the lips or tender touches please
i'd rather die on my two feet than let down on my knees
you know, the cuts you gave me opened up and start to bleed
and i just can't get over you until you're over me

i cannot refuse your eyes
please don't look at me tonight
my heart beats fast, i know you're there
i'll pretend like i don't care
i cannot refuse your eyes
please don't look at me tonight
my heart beats fast, i know you're there
i'll pretend like i don't care
it hurts so bad to know the truth
well girl, i'm still in love with you
it hurts so much to know the truth
well girl, i'm still in love with you

-- maroon 5, until you're over me

i still don't have the reason, and you don't have the time

i wake up with blood-shot eyes
struggled to memorize
the way it felt between your thighs
pleasure that made you cry
feels so good to be bad
not worth the aftermath, after that
after that
try to get you back

i still don't have the reason
and you don't have the time
and it really makes me wonder
if i ever gave a f- about you

give me something to believe in
cause i don't believe in you anymore, anymore
i wonder if it even makes a difference to try
so this is goodbye

god damn, my spinning head
decisions that made my bed
now i must lay in it
and deal with things i left unsaid
i want to dive into you
forget what you're going through
i get behind, make your move
forget about the truth

and you told me how you're feeling
but i don't believe it's true anymore, anymore
i wonder if it even makes a difference to cry
so this is goodbye

i've been here before
one day i'll wake up
and it won't hurt anymore
you caught me in a lie
i have no alibi
the words you say don't have a meaning cause..

i still don't have the reason
and you don't have the time
and it really makes me wonder
if i ever gave a f- about you and i...
and so this is goodbye

-- maroon 5, makes me wonder

i got you babes

i feel so happy. so invincible. all my worries are so far away. and i forgot about the million things i still have to do tonight. all this because i took the bus to work (one of my least favorite things) and was forced to watch you got me during the trip.

i don’t really go for sam milby. zanjoe marudo is even worse and toni gonzaga is only marginally better. the script needs more work and the story is far out at times. but somehow, the movie left a big impression on me. for today, at least, policeman kevin became the perfect man. i envied moe’s close relationship with her dad. the whole swat ops angle is a bit incredible, especially the role of kevin the i.t. guy in the team. but then, pinoy films are sometimes so unreal that i’m thinking it’s intentional.

maybe it was the closet (or not) romantic in me. maybe it’s the same as going around book sale kiosks and trying to find that romance paperback that will melt my heart – when i’ve got a thousand others collecting dust back at home. romance is associated with cheesiness, just like clichés. but much like clichés getting overused because they are truth, the universal truth is that romance is such a big part of our lives. no matter how tacky it gets.

you do it to yourself... you and no one else

the things we do for friendship.

still on wedding playlist mode... i can't seem to concentrate on my report for this saturday, for which i've done nothing. so i'm taking some wise guy's advice, and try to accomplish something else so it wouldn't be a distraction. not that it's a bother (hi ness!), it's just that i'm too excited and anxious about the result. and because i needed a bit of tweaking for one of the songs, i have asked around for audio editing software and got the audacity software for free. but that's enough audio tweaking for the day. i'm sleepy. as always.

so, three days till report day. i am so not ready to eat soap (nyehehehe) in class again, though it really is most likely. oh well.

songs for the week:

carrie underwood, i'll stand by you. all right, i was teary-eyed when this clip was played on american idol. and yes, i also did not like her at all, until this song. i have lots of respect for the pretenders, and i think this version does justice to the song.

mark ronson (feat. phantom planet), just. just found this guy on douglas' multiply page, and i picked this one to try out because i was curious -- someone actually covered radiohead, and from my favorite album too. i was sooooo not disappointed. when i get to school i'm going to download the rest, i was that impressed. (post title comes from the chorus of this song.)

nowhere to go but up

almost two months into my comeback bid, i am yet to finalize my topic for strama. these two months have proven that choosing my subject for the paper is not the easiest part. i encountered a whole gamut of problems on this portion alone -- either the business was not suitable for my purpose, important data is almost impossible to get, or i got vetoed. even as i tried to compensate with my class performance, i despaired of ever getting past this hurdle. hopes of graduating this term -- or graduating at all -- were slowly floating away.

i must have done something right, because things are finally looking up.

now that i've almost clinched my topic, the real work begins. all this time wasted on waiting is going to haunt me in the next months. but i'm starting to feel positive -- like our prof said we should be feeling right now. i just hope that i still have it when i'm overwhelmed and going crazy with worry.

leaving yesterday behind

i received a text message today from my high school friend nex. she had finished with her compre exams and will be graduating with her masters in... community development? i keep forgetting. (geez. what a great friend i am.) only two years ago, we were both suffering anxiety over our respective graduation requirements: her thesis and my strama paper. now, everyone in our group who went into graduate school has earned their degree or diploma, except me. how ironic.

what a bummer

just got word last week that blog city's free blogging service is on its last legs. so this is the start of my nine-month migration to blogger, my next-oldest blog. just as well, i think i will need those nine months knowing how quick i act on these things.

i'm naturally a sentimental person, and i refused to give up blog city because it was my first ever blog (now over 3 years old), even after i put up 3 more. but i also refuse to pay for something i can get elsewhere for free. maybe i would for something else more important, but not a blog. it's just as well i've become fascinated with multiply, so i won't be missing much what i've already done to my old blog. and i'm really enjoying the cross-posting feature... though there seemed to be some bugs i needed to fix with some entries.

so i guess starting today my blogspot will see much more action than it has in the last few years.

the art of seduction

best buddy mike is a treasure trove of information. and mp3s. here's the result of this useless-yet-insightful thing he sent to me over email today.


as it is, i can't believe i'm that naive. scratch that; i can. i am so naive it's just incredible.

feelin' groovy

i'm almost finished with ripping all the cds here at home for all the love songs they contain... i don't want to touch another jewel case until i need to, so i'm taking a break. not that i mind being landed with this big job of compiling a wedding playlist, but even audiophiles like me suffer from overload.

ai6! never thought i would be following it as closely as rockstar, but there are a few good folks in there. my personal tastes run to blake and gina (who just got axed - boohoo), but i kinda liked jordin too -- she reminded me a lot of jordis from rockstar:inxs. so anyway, thanks to dj i've got a few new mp3s to share with my officemates. hehehe. my favorites from the finals so far: dont get around much anymore (chris richardson), all mixed up (blake).

out of all the songs i ripped this week, this is the prize: simon and garfunkel, the 59th street bridge song (feelin' groovy)

i'm a stitch away from making it, and a scar away from falling apart

does lack of sleep really make people do crazy things?

for the first time in like... ever, i took on the challenge to be embarrassed for certain. in class, in front of 20-plus people.

last night i was supposed to submit my assignment, i was very scatterbrained through the whole thing and passed it incomplete. so what else is new? and since my group was unlike any other group i belonged to in my three years in grad school, we didn't even prepare anything for our presentation today. because i was first to arrive in class i decided to cover some bases and started putting my submission on powerpoint. like duh, i still haven't recovered from lack of sleep due to inefficient brain activity but i had to pull off magic tricks. then to my eternal good fortune, our group was called first.

to say that i bombed was not an exaggeration. but i kinda expected it, knowing the shoddy (i picked up this word from my friend today) work i had done. what possessed me to even volunteer was unclear, much like understanding why people jump off cliffs or down a can of pesticide. strangely, though, i almost enjoyed the criticism heaped on my logic and obvious lack of preparation. i knew i was in for it, but i didn't care and the little voice in my head was saying, "bring it on!" and until now, i'm more worried about disappointing my prof than being put through a wringer.

ok, here's my cue for shutting off my laptop for a whole day. strama is going to have to take the back seat for now.

last song syndrome: fall out boy, [after] life of the party

pop! goes my heart

i remember the first time i passed the billboard at slex, on my way home. immediately i whipped out my mobile and sent a message to my friend nessy, telling her about this new movie with hugh grant and drew barrymore in it... and i forgot the title. eventually, the more i thought about it, the lower my expectations got. still reeling from the disappointment of two weeks' notice, i was determined not to put too much stock on music and lyrics having a seemingly unique plot (80's has-been, anyone?) and two acknowledged romantic comedy mainstays.

fate conspired to let me watch the movie today, alone as usual. my good luck even extended to the ticket booth, where the sales lady allowed me to get the ticket though i was 5 pesos short -- on the other hand, it's their fault for not having change for 500 bucks -- which i didn't forget to give back. so, i lugged my mocha latte and planted myself on one of the back row aisle seats, and got ready to be underwhelmed (but laugh at appropriate intervals).

i'm not really good at writing reviews and i'm too impatient to get into the kind of detail a well-thought-of review requires, so here's what i think off the bat. as usual, hugh grant and drew barrymore prove their mettle as romantic leads. not as spectacular as the chemistry in notting hill and 50 first dates, but at least they made me believe they're who they were supposed to be in the movie. well, except for the pre-recording party where drew wore this amazing white patterned coat over a cute black dress... i'm not sure even now that sophie is more bohemian like most of drew's characters, but the outfit really stood out. the supporting cast was ok, not too many people to get confused about, and haley bennet is probably headed for stardom. the plot is so-so. one review quipped that the romantic development wasn't so convincing, and i agree. maybe the movie got too short to properly take us through the nuances of the love story. much like a fountains of wayne song.

speaking of, i come to my favorite part, which is the soundtrack. the review i read before seeing the movie especially took note of the soundtrack kind of holding the movie together. yes, the one mostly written by fountains of wayne's adam schlesinger (to refresh: they were the ones behind stacy's mom). what i didn't know was that adam is also the one behind that catchy song by the wonders. i truly enjoyed the songs featured in the movie, like the cheesy 80's hit (well, in their universe) that i was singing along to at the beginning of the movie. i'll even go out on a limb here and say that way back into love should seriously be given radio airplay. i just don't remember this song called meaningless kiss they keep bringing up in the reviews. and honestly, i really appreciate the actors being the singers as well. i really do. hugh grant can definitely carry a tune.

and boy, can he dance. well, at least he can do it with gusto as a joke. i seem to remember richard curtis fearing that hugh grant will never again dance in public, following that infamous scene in the hallways of 10 downing street on love, actually. expect the same convoluted running-man, multiply by 100. the hip thrusting gets tired after a while (no pun intended. i know what you're thinking! hahaha!), and it's obviously one of the long-running inside jokes. the producers of this movie obviously saw the other film for them to milk hugh's dancing prowess for all the laughs they could get.

so anyway, to end this pathetic attempt of a review i will say that music and lyrics isn't bad for a typical romantic comedy. i think if you balance your expectations well enough you might actually be pleasantly surprised.

the itchy and scratchy show

it's official. the police will open the 49th grammys on 11 february (12 feb in manila).

thanks to drei for the heads up. he also dared me to file my leave, now na. (but i haven't. hehehe.)

read the grammy press release here.

obviously i can't make a good spin on this because i'm currently suffering from an allergy outbreak. yeah. just trying to distract myself from the itchies.

i don't know when i got bitter, but love is surely better when it's gone

sometimes i really wonder why i'm still here. it's not as if i know what i'm doing.

i always felt that i wasn't ready to take on the expert role. i don't have much expertise to begin with. the time i could have learned from someone who knows what he's doing -- and knows how to wing it if he didn't -- was cut pitifully short. now i'm left all alone to be the police and the servant at the same time. and come up with magic tricks in between.

maybe i'm ill-equipped smarts-wise. it's like i don't remember anything i learned after theory of interest. i don't even understand the first few pages of the actuarial mathematics reviewer. so how can i even try to discern whether this or that technical paper is the key to solving my ratemaking problem? i don't even know half the theorems they mention.

maybe i have a weak support system. the unfortunate thing about belonging to this industry is that there are few actuarial experts, unlike in the traditional industries that actuaries are involved with. my ex-boss can't help me now, and i don't know who to turn to. and this is actually one of my biggest headaches: there's no one to run to for expert advice.

maybe i'm just lazy, which is my usual problem.

maybe it's just time for me to move on. but the map isn't in my hands just yet.

---

despite yesterday starting off the wrong foot -- and me getting up on the wrong side of the bed, almost literally -- i got a pleasant surprise that made my day. i finally met drei in the most unexpected manner -- we were working in the same building! snaps to YM and smart gprs for making it all happen.

song of the week: sade, no ordinary love. i'm digging the urbandub and deftones versions, coz i haven't heard the original yet.

the blog post title comes from tonic's you wanted more.

love can mend your life, but love can break your heart

finally, something to smile about.

every fan of the police must be jumping for joy right now. as i am.

the rumors are crazier than ever and it seems that our greatest dream is about to come true. after more than 20 years, sting is finally talking with andy summers and stewart copeland about a possible reunion to commemorate the 30th anniversary of the first police single, roxanne.

the official statement from a&m is that there may be something special in the wind, hopefully with the participation of the band. though noncommital, sting commented in an interview that the three of them are actually talking about it. but hopefully, there would be a series of performances throughout the summer as some websites speculate. not like the single post-breakup public performance when they were inducted into the rock and roll hall of fame in 2003. aside from that, the only other time they played together was at sting's wedding, and it was an impromptu thing.

i grew up on their music but only appreciated it in the last decade. and i am so glad that there's finally that chance -- no matter how slim -- that i will get to experience the magic for myself.

---

read the info for yourself, go here:

the daily mirror article

the daily mail article

this is cute, though.

msnbc news